Paper link: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1P3cgEhi9wEyP2LSaBUMBmAabeo2rO8xxj3cHy5w_Wj0/edit
The main point that I was trying to get across with this paper is that teaching writing forms hurts a student's creativity as a writer. I used examples of actual writing forms and provided the effect they had on student's writing. I provided a little bit of the counter argument also but tried to stayed focus on my point. I think the parts that included the five paragraph essay went well mostly I think because I could find the most source on that particular form. Please note anything you see wrong with the flow or the structure of the paper. There are a lot of different things I bring up in the paper so its important I make sure that it is very easy to follow and understand.
Shawyawn,
ReplyDeleteAs usual your language is great and you make clear points; the main concern I have is that this paper seems to want to address a general audience that is largely ignorant of these issues. Currently there is no mention that other people have had anything to say about this issue for nearly the first half of the paper; with an academic specialized audience, it is important to situate the paper in an ongoing relevant conversation. Placing your writing in a conversation increases the challenge to say something new that others haven't already said, but whey you're writing for people who may already be somewhat familiar with the issue, that is essential.
I was not able to comment on your actual document because it would not let me, but I will give you all my feedback in this comment. I could clearly make out your main point of how there is the ‘right’ way to teach how to write and how that leads to the decrease in our ability to be creative. I could tell how passionate you are from this paper and it really grabbed my attention and kept me wanting to read. I agree completely with what you had to say and with your great use of vocabulary it enticed me even more. Throughout the paper I found only minor errors where there should be some commas, and some wording was a little off, but if you go back through to revise I am sure you will see those. I felt it had a nice flow going from paragraph to paragraph. Also, I thought you added in the examples well and used a good amount. I felt throughout the paper you really implemented your argument and were able to support it. If you can change the settings so I can go back through to highlight things in your paper, I will I was just not able to do it.
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